Fatties lose weight, gain bronzer [The Biggest Loser]

The Biggest Loser contestants should all have at least five kilograms deducted from their final weights; their gaunt cheeks, razor chins and sinewy limbs were slathered with at least that much bronzer.

I almost forgot about The Biggest LoserSo You Think You Can Dance has finished, Big Brother has started, so Loser‘s predictable final three nearly slipped clear from my head. It was almost like my brain presiently knew how anticlimactic Sam’s eventual victory would be; my pal Coby succinctly compared the excitement at the end to that of a child winning a raffle for a meat tray.

And why did the top three seem so overwhelmingly joyless to learn their weight-loss totals? Kirsten and Sam both grimaced when they stepped up to the scales (the latter only cheered up when he realised he’d won). Usually I dig the fatties’ remarkable transformations but this finale was as lacking as the contestants’ rice-cakes-and-lettuce diets.

Capping off the lacklustre end to the season was a bizarre and pointless “world first”: every fatty who’s ever had anything to do with The Biggest Loser (with the exception of Ajay Rochester, who was unable to find a top that flattered her ham arms) stood together on a super-sized scale that calculated the total number of kilos lost. Oh… wow?


One Response to “Fatties lose weight, gain bronzer [The Biggest Loser]”

  1. Did you notice Michelle the trainers makeup?
    Somebody set the gun to whore!!!!

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